In Evangelical Christianity, many pastors have risen to near celebrity status. Everything they do, everything they say is under the microscope. Even if a pastor isn't nationally or internationally known, it is likely that they are well known within their community. People could pick them out of a crowd at Pizza Hut or Wal-Mart. But there is a unique group of people who are along for the ride but have never asked to be singled out. They did not respond to a "call." They did not necessarily climb into the spotlight of their own volition. They may not even have a full understanding of their spiritual standing. This special group of individuals are singled out just the same. They are the pastors kids--otherwise known as PKs.
Barnabas Piper grew up knowing all about the joys and trials of such a life. His dad is John Piper, internationally recognized preacher and author of numerous books. Now Barnabas is a skilled writer and author in his own right, and he has some things to say. But he does not write this book to throw his family under the bus (John Piper actually wrote the foreward) or piggyback on his father's noteriety. He writes this book to give readers an inside look at what it is like to be a PK and to help PKs themselves deal with some of the issues that they have faced--or as the subtitle has it, help with "finding your own faith and identity."
Most pastor's kids that I have known, myself included, cannot win. People assume that you are a trouble-maker or put you on a pedistal. Neither one is fair. People make many other assumptions, as well, and treat you accordingly. That is partly what this book is about. Barnabas also gives many insights into the difficulties that PKs face, so that pastors and congregants alike can avoid doing damage to these unique individuals within our churches.
This book has been really good for me. For most of my life I have been a PK, and now I am in the ministry myself. I can identify with quite a bit of what Barnabas has written concerning the difficulties and blessings of growing up in that kind of environment: I was often under the microscope, expected to be the leader, and preached at in the home. But I am also reminded of how blessed I have been to view my experience in a (mostly) positive light. There were some negatives to be sure, but my parents worked hard to avoid several of the pitfalls that he describes in this book. I even received a lot of mentoring in ministry by my dad and had the blessing of learning many skills that serve me well now. But I know other PK's who weren't as fortunate.
Barnabas doesn't claim to speak for every PK, but I think he speaks for a majority. He doesn't write merely from his limited experience--he has spent time interviewing other PKs and doing research. As a matter of fact, not all of the situations or criticisms that he offers are a part his own experience at all--and, so, I think it rings true to the general experience of PKs. The simple fact is that most of us are measured against our fathers, rather than as the individuals that we really are and we were (or are) held to a higher standard than the rest of the youth of the church.
What ar PKs to do? How do we respond? The reality is, and I speak for numerous PKs, I do not care what my father thinks about many things. I am not a chip off the old block. He has influenced me and taught me, and now I am taking my own lane and going my own speed. And that is what PKs must be able to do. We must choose to do it, and the church must let us (kindle location 479).
I recommend that anyone in ministry read it and take note; PKs read it and know that you are not alone; and congregants read it with an eye to supporting and praying for their pastors and their kids.
"The preacher, instead of looking out upon the world, looks
out upon public opinion, trying to find out what the public would like to hear.
Then he tries his best to duplicate that, and bring his finished product into a
marketplace in which others are trying to do the same. The public, turning to
our culture to find out about the world, discovers there is nothing but its own
reflection. The unexamined world, meanwhile, drifts blindly in the future."
--Dining With the Devil, by Os Guinness p.59 citing a quote from Context, 15 April 1991, p.4
This quote strikes me as true. It's a symptom of the attractional model church that peddles the "gospel" for it's own self-serving aims: growth, popularity, power. Churches have turned people into numbers. We want to get butts in the seats and keep them there...and if we have to take the sting out of the gospel to do it--then so be it. We tweak the music and our dress codes. We build gyms to make our facilities more appealing. We modernize the children's programs. We want to be accepted in the community. But where is the substance? Where is the awe of God? Where is the power?
For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine.
Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number
of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear. --2 Timothy 4:3
What is the purpose of the church? According to Revelation 5:10, we are "a kingdom and priests to our God." We can't cater to the "needs" of some people at the cost of the church's holiness or the gospel message of repentance from sin and toward discipleship.
The interesting thing is that we have tried to make the church so palatable to the world that we have lost our uniqueness. In his book, Who's Afraid of Postmodernism?, James K. A. Smith states this well:
Worship, then, needs to be characterized by hospitality; it needs to be
inviting. But at the same time, it should be inviting seekers into the church
and its unique story and language. Worship should be an occasion of
cross-cultural hospitality. Consider and analogy: When I travel to France, I
hope to be made to feel welcome. However, I don't expect my French hosts
to become Americans in order to make me feel at home. I don't expect them to
start speaking English, ordering pizza, talking about the New York Yankees, and
so on. Indeed, if I wanted that, I would have just stayed at home! Instead, what
I'm hoping for is to be welcomed into their French culture; that's why I've come
to France in the first place. And I know that this will take some work on my
part. I'm expecting things to be different; indeed, I'm looking for just this
difference. So also, I think, with hospitable worship: seekers are looking for
something our culture can't provide. Many don't want a religious version of what
they can already get at the mall. And this is especially true of postmodern or
Gen X seekers: they are looking for elements of transcendence and challenge that
MTV could never give them. Rather that an MTVized version of the gospel, they
are searching for the mysterious practices of the ancient gospel" (78).
Here's a unique attractional model for us:
"But I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all men to myself."--John 12:32
It's easy for us to point fingers at our churches, ministers and elders, but let us not forget that the Church is made up of people, people who are buying into this mode of being, as well. We have to be different. We can't be afraid to stand out. If we look like the world, talk like the world, think like the world and live like the world then what in the world is there for the world to see in us? The salt has lost it's saltiness.
It's time for us to be different--be godly. It's time for us to have a sense of Awe in worship. A.W. Tozer nails this on the head in The Knowledge of the Holy.
"The history of mankind will probably show that no people has ever risen
above its religion, and man's spiritual history will positively demonstrate
that no religion has ever been greater than its idea of God. Worship is pure or
base as the worshiper entertains high or low thoughts of God" (1).
In a world full of talk--the world wants to see action. But not mindless action. They want to see God in action. They want to see His people in action and acting as if they believe that He is truly there. What do people see in us?
I must admit that politics is one of those areas of discussion that I try to say clear of with many people because it can be so divisive. If I'm going to draw a hard line in the sand, I want to make sure that it is for the sake of the Gospel. However, I do believe that it is important for Christians to take part in the political process in order to be "salt and light" in our world. At the same time, we should realize that our particular political party or concern is not synonymous with God's kingdom. The only hope for the world is the Gospel and finally the reign of Christ in the New Creation, so how does this fit within Niebuhr's Christ and Culture paradigms?
In 1951 H. Richard Niebuhr wrote a book called Christ and Culture, which presented the model that is still commonly used when Christians discuss how Christians should engage the culture. He believed that there were five prevalent ways the Church has viewed culture:
1. Christ against culture
2. Christ of culture
3. Christ above culture
4. Christ and culture in paradox
5. Christ transforming culture
When we look at Nieburhr's five approaches to "Christ and culture", the "Christ transforming culture" model is highly compatible with Christians engaging in political spheres. Dennis Hollinger writes, "Adherents emphasize that God the creator and God the redeemer are one, and thus redemption is not a move away from the world but a transformation of the world that God created and still rules." John Calvin saw that "in some measure, begins the heavenly kingdom in us, even now upon earth, and in this mortal and evanescent life commences immortal and incorruptible blessedness, while to the latter it is assigned, so long as we live among men, to foster and maintain the external worship of God, to defend sound doctrine and the condition of the Church, to adapt our conduct to human society, to form our manners to civil justice, to conciliate us to each other, to cherish common peace and tranquility." According to Jonathan Blanchard, "every true minister of Christ is a universal reformer, whose business it is, so far as possible, to reform all the evils which press on human concerns." Matthew 5:13-16 makes it clear that we are to be salt and light in our world and to "let [our] light shine before others." As Martin Luther King Jr. pointed out, "the church is the body of Christ...but...we have blemished and scarred that body through social neglect."
Understanding that Christ wants to use His body as a transforming agent in society, Christians can be free to lobby and vote for better laws to effect change. However, I tend to side with Stephen Carter who believes that "religions...will almost always lose their best, most spiritual selves when they choose to be involved in the partisan, electoral side of American politics" (as quoted in Hollinger's Choosing the Good: Christian Ethics In a Complex World), so I feel that it is probably best for the Church at large to stick to a prophetic model, using general principles and middle axioms. In working for Christ's kingdom, we must not forget what Jesus told Pilate, "My kingdom is not from this world" (John 18:36). It becomes very easy for Christians to slip into the optimism and softening of the harder teachings of the "Christ of culture" model.
May we find some help in the "Christ against culture" paradigm? I'll look at this in my next post. In the mean time, please share your thoughts on how you understand the Christian's role in politics.
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Yesterday I sat down in a pastor's office to discuss his thoughts on discipleship. From the church website I could see that it was a big deal to him and the life of his church, so I wanted to meet with him and find out what that looks like. When he sat on his couch, kicked off his shoes and propped his feet up on a chair I knew this guy was comfortable in his own skin and was going to be real with me. If I were to write all of what we talked about, it would fill a whole string of blog posts, but I'll share with you one important insight from our time together.
Pastors should focus on making disciples. Too often we try to develop servants or givers or people who will share the Gospel. We may succeed in developing all those things in our people without ever really making disciples. A person can be a giver without being a true follower of Jesus. A person could serve the needs of the community without being a disciple. Someone can even witness to others without being truly a disciple of Jesus. How do we know this? Just think of what people in our churches would do if we took away the nursery, the youth group time, the padded seating, the flashy lights and rock star worship performances...what about the air conditioning or heat? True disciples are there for Jesus--not for any of these other reasons. True disciples are consumed with Jesus (what a novel idea!). However, if we spend our time growing and cultivating disciples, then we will have churches filled with givers, servants, evangelists, teachers, etc. etc. because true disciples do all of those things.
This is an interesting thought that rings true. We often get consumed with getting the fruits on the tree and we spend our time on the fruit rather than cultivating and feeding the tree itself. Can you imagine someone going throughout an orchard stapling apples to sick or dead trees?
"Why is this fruit rotting on the tree?"
"Wake up and smell the coffee, Einstein, the tree is dead. Start growing trees that bear fruit in keeping with repentance."
So let me finish by asking some logical questions:
Why are many (if not most) of our churches focusing on life enhancement, like some late night infomercial, rather than getting to the core of discipleship?
Why do we work so hard to attract people to our churches based on self-gratification and materialistic pyrotechnics, when following Jesus (you know...the Guy who said to people who thought they were ready to jump on the band wagon, "Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head," or, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.") is ultimately to lead them in the opposite direction? How many people would still show up to church if they knew that they might be arrested?
Why are we building our houses on the sand of feel-good-
fluff and superficial community? (Matt 7:26-27).
Why shouldn't discipleship be every pastor's number one priority?
In Evangelical Christianity, many pastors have risen to near celebrity status. Everything they do, everything they say is under the microscope. Even if a pastor isn't nationally or internationally known, it is likely that they are well known within their community. People could pick them out of a crowd at Pizza Hut or Wal-Mart. But there is a unique group of people who are along for the ride but have never asked to be singled out. They did not respond to a "call." They did not necessarily climb into the spotlight of their own volition. They may not even have a full understanding of their spiritual standing. This special group of individuals are singled out just the same. They are the pastors kids--otherwise known as PKs.
